Sometimes I take up side gigs as an emotional prostitute.
By emotional prostitute, I mean a Business English tutor.
Contrary to common sense, students who say they want to learn Business English do not in fact want to learn Business English.
What they want is this: to have a conversation in English and feel confident and smart while doing it.
That’s where I come in: the emotional prostitute.
I call it emotional prostitution because these conversations quickly take a personal turn. They tell me about their dating lives and their childhood trauma. I’m not sure why. Is it because of the questions I ask them? It is true I can tend to get personal and intense rather quickly. Is it because it’s the only hour of their week where they don’t have to talk about work?
People who want to learn Business English are usually CEOs, doctors, lawyers, etc.
Sometimes we meet in a French tea room, or a restaurant in the style of Vecchia Milano, sometimes on Microsoft Teams, or in a French cafe for a cocktail (always French stuff with them), often in private conference rooms in high rise buildings overlooking the tips of the duomo, and of course I always take a company logo pen from the middle tray while waiting, or in their offices decorated with gifted whiskies and film posters, walls lined with binders and binders. And for a time, the office library of a celebrity billionaire.
It didn’t last long.
You’ve heard his name, I’m certain of it, and though I never signed an NDA, I’d rather not say it. Instead I’ll call him Mr. Hood.
When his assistant first contacted me and I heard him say his boss’ name, I thought I must’ve misheard. I thought he was saying a shortened version of the company name. Though I knew who he was, I didn’t know that much about him.
I googled him, and that’s how I found out he was a billionaire. As well as two other notable things. He once commented on Selena Gomez’s photo: UGLY. He was canceled for saying something very racist.
The room we met in was beautiful, an art library with a rococo chapel in the corner, two Lego statues of him and his co-founder.
He was absolutely fascinated by one phrase in English.
Smoking is my only vice.
It was the only phrase I translated for him that he repeated in English, again and again throughout our conversations.
Smoking. Is. My only vice.
I won’t write here the way he told his origin story, what he learned in 20 years of therapy, his creative struggles, his fears and family drama, his matter-of-fact admission of something embarrassing, nor will I post the photos I took of the wheel of fragrances he drew for me to explain his artistic method. (Just invite me to a dinner party.)
The people who worked around him always seemed nervous, particularly his assistant, who called me often and met with me before and after each lesson. How was he? he would ask. Does he want to meet with you again? Okay, he would say, well, even if he said he does, I have to tell you, he will probably change his mind.
I forgot he was famous during our first conversation.
“Where are you from?” Mr. Hood asked me.
“California. Have you ever been there?”
He looked at me. “Many times.”
This was around the time I fell in love with the Kardashians (via The Kardashians). I found great comfort in their complete disregard of the existence of carbon emissions, seeming to fly from Southern California to Milan and then back again every episode. Take me with you, girlz.
Of course Kim K. has a brand deal and friendship with Mr. Hood, and there he was on an episode, then another. Strangely comforting it was to watch older women have the same arguments as those at my Orange County high school, to see the kitchen styles and juice bars that I grew up around, and in the next frame a shot of my current neighborhood six thousand miles away, and then there, a man I knew. In his limited screen presence, he would greet Kim K. and ask her how she is, and I’d film it on Snapchat and caption: I taught him that. No thank you, he’d say. I taught him that too, I’d write.
Why was everyone so scared of him? By their tones of voice I felt it was inevitable a drink would be thrown in my face at some point, but it never happened. Were they afraid of him because he called someone ugly in public (on the internet)? Unfortunately, that is grounds for the tenth circle of hell in Milan. Maybe not calling someone ugly, but being ugly, for sure.
“Every city has a sex and an age which have nothing to do with demography. Rome is feminine. So is Odessa. London is a teenager, an urchin, and this hasn’t changed since the time of Dickens. Paris, I believe, is a man in his twenties in love with an older woman.”
― John Berger
Milan is a beautiful city. Design, models, art, typography, il cenacolo. Milan is an ugly city. Pollution, the Pianura Padana, post-war cheaply reconstructed buildings, almost-forever gray skies.
If Milan were a person, she would be an elegant middle-aged woman with a heavy, draping skirt, and bright, circular sunglasses. Her style would be strictly tailored natural fibers with a touch of seventies flair. She would insist on walking. If she felt it to be true, she would call you ugly to your face, or comment it on your Instagram photo. Her Italian accent would have a hint of Southern anger. She would be away on vacation seven months of the year but tell you she lives here permanently.
Anyway, I promised to send a feminist city guide with female-owned businesses and the history of women in the area about once a month. That is why this is called the City of Ladies, after all. So here’s that. Milan is a city of ladies:
Someone to know:
Alda Merini (1931-2009) - a renowned Italian poetess whose legacy has been preserved at the Spazio Alda Merini museum in the Navigli neighborhood. Despite (or inspired by) being labeled as "mad", Merini dedicated her life to poetry and literature. The museum also hosts events, including conferences, concerts, and presentations, to celebrate the life and work of Alda Merini and other literary figures.
Where to eat (breakfast):
*June Collective (!) - by chefs Mythila and Ilze who have very impressive resumes
*Le Polveri - the locals’ fav, created by Aurora Zancarato
*Signor Lievito - Nordic inspired pastries and coffee founded by Natalia Nikitina
*Ambrogia il Forno - cute bakery with the best outdoor aesthetic owned by Federica Ferrari & Francesca Gatti
shoes from Vibi Venezia of c POP (Piece of Pie) is a bar located in the Porta Venezia neighborhood founded by Fedya Crespolini and designed by Milena Cannavacciuolo
Where to eat (lunch):
La Colubrina - the chefs, Franca Marrone and Consuelo Giovanetti, are a mother and daughter duo who embraced a food philosophy based on a deep respect for nature
Les Pommes Bistrot - bar, tea room, and bistrot owned by Fabiana Greco
Erba Brusca - with chef Alice Decourt
*Altatto - Altatto is a vegetarian (with vegan options) cuisine project founded by three female chefs and friends: Giulia Scialanga, Cinzia De Lauri, and Sara Nicolosi. The three women met by working together at the famous restaurant, Joia, in Milan
Where to eat (dinner):
*Silvano - they have an amazing female sommelier (Martina) and I would say this is probably the best restaurant I’ve ever eaten at in Italy!!! PLS GO HERE! (And tell me about it.)
Erba Brusca - I mentioned it for lunch, but you can also go for dinner.
Acquada - this name means “storm” in the Lombard dialect and symbolizes a turning point or the start of something new. The talented chef Sara Preceruti obtained her first Michelin star when she was 28 years old.
Belè - The name "Belé," which means "precious thing" or "small jewel" in Milanese dialect, accurately describes the restaurant's standing in Milan's culinary scene. With its 1920s speakeasy bar-style atmosphere, chef Giulia Ferrara seeks to breathe new life into traditional Italian dishes.
Where to drink (alcohol)
*10 Corso Como - a beautiful space to drink, shop, and look at art founded by former fashion editor and publisher Carla Sozzani
Caffineria - natural wine bar
What to do:
*Fondazione Prada - a cultural center and museum of contemporary art founded by the visionary stylist, Miuccia Prada.
Spazio Alda Merini museum (museum on the aforementioned poetess)
Museo teatrale Alla Scala - After the Second World War, a permanent exhibition was established by Fernanda Wittgens, famous art critic and historian, and it is still open today.
Ekadea Ceramics - take a ceramics class.
Il Cucinista - take a cooking class at a school run by Mariangela Nuccio.
Sale & Balocchi - go to the spa.
*Piazza Belgioioso - See the first statue of a female in Milan honoring Cristina Trivulzio, a prominent figure in the Italian Renaissance and was dedicated to unifying Italy (in a beautiful piazza perfect for people watching)
Where to shop:
Laura Urbinati
*Il Bivio - the first consignment shop in Milan founded by San Francisco native Hilary Belle Walker
Il Posto delle Briciole - an antique shop owned by Sarah De Mory
20134 Lambrate - a vintage shop housed under a 1940s barber shop sign dreamed up by Cecilia Di Lorenzo
Libreria Antigone - a bookshop specializing in feminist and LGBTQ+ literature
*Libreria delle donne - feminist bookshop and cultural center
VeraLab Store - fun, all pink, skincare and beauty brand founded by Cristina Fogazzi.
If Creative Hub - plant store
Where to stay:
Palazzo Segreti - a boutique hotel in the very center of the city
Room Mate Giulia - a hotel founded by Asli Haddas
*my favorites
x
Skyler
Enjoyed this read and all the recommendations here, and took me back to my own trip to Milan last year (also loved 10 Corso Como! https://laurenkatepowell.substack.com/p/meanderings-through-milan) 🇮🇹